Typical? Not in my experience. With my M-Bs over the last couple of decades I've had some work done at the dealer, some at indy shops, and some myself. At least around here, the best indy shops are well regarded by owners and the dealers alike; a couple of them are owned by techs who used to work for one or another of the dealers. When I've told a dealer service advisor that the car was last seen by an indy shop for something, they don't make a fuss about it. Being cagey about details of the history is frustrating but not unusual, given privacy concerns in a litigious society.
When I bought my SLK used I didn't get any more history from either the selling dealer or my own than an assurance that the service was up to date. Carfax told me that services had been performed regularly at time/mileage intervals that looked normal. If you have documentation that the D Service was done, then they ought to simply reset the service indicator for you. So show them the documents, and ask them what else is on the list for the D Service that hasn't already been done. Then schedule that and the recall repair. Trying to up-sell you on stuff is normal, and you shouldn't be shy about saying no if it isn't an immediate issue.
For example, I just had my C230 in for an oil change and a general inspection since it hadn't been into a dealer's service bay in a couple of years as a result of not many miles having run under the wheels in that span of time (driving the SLK is more fun!). The service cost a couple of hundred bucks, and they recommended another grand worth of stuff that could be done soon. An air filter I did myself this morning; a fuel injection service was rejected as unnecessary (car runs fine and Techron is cheaper), and a transmission pilot bushing repair, brake fluid flush, and power steering fluid flush will get done before winter comes. None of those last three are required immediately, so I declined them at this time to budget for them in a few months. They aren't necessarily trying to put anything over on you, but just because they notice something and tell you how much they will charge to fix it doesn't mean you have to have them do those things right away, or at all if you have another trusted shop that you prefer.