The Southern Baptists would have me shot for using the word married, but I was married in a church by ordained ministers and althought we might not be married in the eyes of the law, I beleieve we are in the eyes of God. That was 17 years ago, and not one straight friend or associate has outlasted us, save my parents and grand parents. (Frank's parents passed away a long time ago.)
Besides, I do not care about the word married, I'd take partners or whatever, JUST GIVE US THE DAMN TAX BENIFITS and the ability to see one another in Intesive Care without carrying a Power of Attorney- Healthcare for each other every time we travel!
I would not have an SLK if it wasn't for Frank. True he missed his '94 S500, and wanted to love Mercedes again, but the inefficent 3-vavle engines aloung with the quality issues kept us away. I was set on getting a G35 coupe, as I thought it was an incredible car for the money, and picked up some of the Z bug from a friend. One day Mercedes held a SLK drive and invited us. We went, had a good time, I loved the 6-speed, and thought it would be a nice car but I wasn't planning to spend that much before the house improvements.
A week later, Frank called me on the phone and said "I know you were planning on putting more of your car savings into the house, but I've just seen a G35 coupe and two SLK's. I do not think you will truely be happy with the G35 and a sunroof. The SLK is just so beautiful, and it is typical of the small two seater cars you love to drive. I want you to consider not putting so much of your car money in the house for me, and instead buy something you would enjoy more."
After the loss of the 2005, I almost bought a Speed Yellow Carrera S, but even after driving the 2006 with the lousy non-sport suspension, the thought of a $20,000 loan on the almost $90,000 car turned me off. No loans on pepreciating items. I was about $13,000 short for buying a full boat SLK55 with 030 Nurburgring package, which I thought might cure the nose heavy handling of the regular SLK55, but then again, the pleasure of the 6-speed and no loans won out.
Frank loves my SLK350. He loves the looks of it, inside and out. He loves to ride in it. When he gets in the drivers seat (insert long, loud scratching record sound here) he says "I can't believe how awful and harsh it is to drive compared to riding in it." Listen, mister I-have-not-changed-a-tire in 30 years, I love my run flat tires, ease up on them! Besides, he's expecting isolation at the steeringwheel, something Mercedes has finally gotten rid of.
Frank will not drive my SLK, and I must reassure him many times before he will. He fears wrecking it and getting me angry. It is his own fault, for running my Fiero GT under a van and not telling me. I go out to drive the car and big swaths of scratches are going up the hood.
Frank is far more wonderful then any wife anyone could have. I mean, shopping for a car goes on for days, we both froth over brochures, and neither of us poo-poo any option the other wants. Electronics are the same way. I want a new rear lcd projection slightly larger to the 27" TV we had in the bedroom, and he insists we get the 55" Sony WEGA.
I come from a very poor family. When I was born in Detroit, my parents lived on K-Mart lawn furniture in an appartment on the bad (east) side of Detroit. I was delivered by a nurse as all the doctors in Brent General Hospital were down in the emergency room taking care of riot victims.
M&M may clain Detroit cred, but he only lived there a couple of years. I grew up in that ****. My parents gave everythign they had, and sometimes it was not enough. However, I wouldn't trade it for the world. My mother was a depression era child. She went hungry night after night so that her brother and sister could eat. She went to her high school prom in a poodle skirt made from the living room curtains with coat hangers to make the base.
When I met Frank, my parents had gone up in the world, we lived in a new trailer in Joliet Illinois. ;-) I had a $250 wrecked TC3 I bought off a friend and drove it to college and to deliver pizzas. I also had my $1,200 FIAT X1/9 that I only drove on special occasions, or when the car allowed it.
Frank grew up on the cattle ranch his parents owned in Wyoming. At 17 years old, his mom went out and bought him a new car. It was a 1966 Dodge Charger (yes with the hemi). When I met him, he was driving his leased Pontiac Grand Prix and he had the 300SD with over 200,000 miles in the garage. He also had an ex-wife he bought a new house for not far from him, and three kids, two of which lived with him.
I did not know he had money when I met him at the McDonalds close to his house and my school. He liked each other and things went from there. (Yes, we did have *** on the first date that is SOOOO not a relationship killer that people think.)
When I met Frank, he had money and was making a lot more then I was. I still had to pull my own weight, including paying half for dates, but he taught me a lot of things about how to treat money. Now, I have become very successful on my own and make more money then he does.
Through it all, our differences have made things hard, but also made their easier. I have more love for my little SLK then 90% of the people who buy them, and more respect for the luck and hard work that enabled me to get it. I also tought Frank the same, and also how to use turnsignals.
Unfortunatly, I do not have any direct children and do not know if I ever will. I was extrememly hyperactive as a child (like Sylvester Stallone, only not put in a cage and paralyzing part of my face - I was studied and had a book written about me instead) and did not really sleep until I was around 5 years old. I am not sure I could be the pure saint my mother was and live with that.
I know that at any time I could have lied to a woman and gotten her pregnant and had kids. Honestly, I could not have done that. I could not lie like that, nor ruin someone else's life for my own gain. Frank did it only because he grew up in small town Wyoming and never knew gay people existed. He just thought it was something he had to fight. In the end, it's what God made you, and you can only live a lie for so long.
However, I do have three that I refer to as my "Fairy God Children" that are Franks kids. The oldest daughter (only 5 years younger then me) is on her second child, his youngest daughter has one child, and his son does not have any children yet. They do refer to me as "Grandpa Byron" something that's strange to hear at 38.
All three of them have left the Mormon faith, of which Frank still loves (and he was an Elder and had high position in the church) due to the fact they could not rectify the church saying their dad was living in sin, but would not marry him, and other words making him a bad person. Frank has given everything he has, and has helped many, many people, and his kids, althought they intially disliked it like most, said that if two people like us can be so in love, and be such good people then the church must be wrong.
Frank is 19 years older than me, and different in every way, yet I love him dearly. My only fear is that he will most likely predecease me.
I have to tell you though, meeting his ex-wife at the one daugter's wedding.... She came up to me, put her hand on my shoulder and said "Byron how are you doing?" I about pissed my pants and ran for cover. I'm a big guy that doesn't scare easily, but she could have had a gun in that hand bag. That's when I learned about the drug of daughter's weddings on their mothers. She only dislikes me because she left Frank and through she would find someone, instead he did. She has since gone back to glarring at me from afar.
There are many personal biases in the bible. Quite frankly you cannot enforce things like Liviticus telling you a man should be killed for sleeping with another man, when you don't enforce the same Apisitle that says you must stone your wife for wearing a silk blouse with a cotton skirt, or for eating shrimp. Slavery? Who think's that's something good for society?
My idea of the bible and God's wishses boil down to this:
1. Honesty in everythign you say and do.
2. Love for everyone, true love for your significant other, and love and respect for your neighbors and fellow humans.
3. Judgement is God's domain, and we are not to judge each other, but to love and resepect each other. Sins will be judged and paid for in the afterlife.
PS: I joined a dating service and paid $20 for twenty matches. I got a paper in the mail with three. I was very open in my listing of requirements. First one spent all the time telling me how beautiful he was, second had so much in commen we had nothing to talk about that the other didn't know. Third one was Frank.
Six months later, they sent me a check for $17 for my unused matches and a letter explaining they were going out of business. So it cost me $3 plus a dinner at McDonalds to meet the love of my life!