Sometimes you have to be like a statue - Mercedes Benz SLK Forum

Driving Stories Politically correct way of saying Kill stories

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#1 Old 05-29-2017
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Sometimes you have to be like a statue

There's a major shopping outlet village by us.
One of the link roads is a dual carriageway with divider.
Only 40mph.
Then a roundabout and another short run until a final roundabout that
joins the main, single carriageway. Where we turn right.

Occasionally prey isn't about taking on the big boys, but waking up the numpties.

Todays numpty had a family SUV, chose the wrong lane.
Used his mirrors though and spotted me.
He gunned it to make sure that he got to the first 'roundy' before me,
Still in wrong lane.
I 'squeezed' him a tad but not really showing full intent.

Wobbled negotiating the roundy and desperate to stay ahead he floored it.
I didn't. Just cruised & let him lane swap.

Wobbled around the final roundy and onto the single carriageway.
As I negotiated it I had prime view of the road we turned on to.

Clear from on coming traffic and just a few cars going the same way.
Didn't even light the magic triangle.
Taken completely by surprise he then tried to make up the gap.
So two more takes and tuck back into traffic flow.
Settling back down before turning into the town centre and a 30mph.

FINALLY THE PENNY DROPPED.
Family SUV cannot accelerate faster than a sports car,
Cannot turn like a sports car.
He settled into his rightful role.

Mobile chicane.

I could have dusted this in the first few yards, but I think I was a cat in a previous life.
Maybe I recognised my mouse?!?

Never thought I'd enjoy shopping so much as I do in the AMG.







Courtesy of the Oxford English
numpty
[ˈnʌmpti]

NOUN
SCOTTISH
informal
a stupid or ineffectual person.

Myk
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